Break Even USUK Songfic
by PrussiaHax
Summary: Just a little song-fic I wrote about Arthur's feelings without Alfred. Based off the song Break Even by The Script. I own nothing! USUK, one-shot, somewhat one-sided on Arthur's part, though I secretly believe they are both head over heels for each other.


Yo! Ok, this one is just mine (Prussia'sIndia), something I felt needed to be written. I absolutely love this song, and I thought it kinda fit the whole Revolution pretty well, ya know? Well, I hope ya like it!

Disclaimer: I disclaim everything in this. There. I hate these. The whole point of a FANFICTION is that it's a FAN and FINCTION story, not real, by a fan who has no ownership of anything. But, whatever. It's just a few darn words to write. I guess I'm just a lazy bum.

* * *

_I'm still alive but I'm barely breathing_

_Just praying to a God that I don't believe in_

_Cuz I got time while she's got freedom_

_Cuz when a heart breaks, no, it don't break even..._

The rain pounded down hard around me as I stared up at the tall figure before me. Tears poured from my wide, blood-shot eyes, sobs racking my small figure.

_Why is he doing this to me? Aren't I good enough for him? Why is he leaving me? Don't leave me!_

The words screamed over and over in my head as his beautiful blue eyes looked down at me with pity. No, don't look at me that way!

"You used to be so big..."

No, no, no! Don't say that to me! You're still a kid. Still that little boy I loved so dearly. You can't be big anymore. I never got to properly watch you grow up. Please, don't do this to me!

Now you got what you wanted. You're free. And leaving my behind in the mud. With my torn and broken heart laying at my feet.

_Her best days were some of my worst_

_She finally found a man who's gonna put her first_

_While I'm wide awake she's no trouble sleeping_

_Cuz when a heart breaks no it don't break even_

For years on end I'd lose sleep at night trying to figure out what I did wrong. I treated you good, didn't I? I showed you unconditional love and compassion. You were my everything, and even through the pain, all that mattered to me was your happiness. And it still wasn't enough. Couldn't you have just told me what you wanted, not just said: I'm leaving? You say you wanted freedom, you wanted more. More of what? Just tell me already!

I see you now at the meeting all the time, so grown up, but still with the heart of a child. You can't be an adult yet. It's still too soon. Too soon.

We're allies now, some might even call us friends, but when was the last time we properly spoke?

I see how you look at him. He's your new best friend, he's your new everything. Kiku can never do wrong in your eyes. Even after the war, you reconciled much quicker with him than me. Why? Do you like him better? What does he have that I don't? I know it's not nice, but I sometimes like to anticipate the day you rip his heart out and leave him, too...

_What am I supposed to do when the best part of me was always you?_

_What am I supposed to say when I'm all choked up and you're okay?_

_I'm fallin' to pieces, yeah_

_I'm fallin' to pieces_

When you left me like that, did you ever look back and wonder if you made the right choice? Did you ever think maybe, just maybe, I might still need you? I thought at first you weren't ready to leave me, you still needed me. But I quickly realized I needed you. But no, you just walked away, strong and proud, while I screamed my heart out, unable to fight back, to fight for you, anymore. I have my all for my everything, and you just left.

Was I really that unimportant, that you could just walk away without a second thought? Did you feel anything at all? Other than pity? Maybe regret, sorrow, pain?

I felt my entire self begin to crumble, and I began to wonder if I would ever survive. Somehow, I did.

_They say bad things happen for a reason_

_But no wise words gonna stop the bleeding_

_Cuz she's moved on while I'm still grieving _

_Cuz when a heart breaks, no, it don't break even..._

I thought I could try and forget you, like you seemed to forget me. You just rose up so quickly, surpassing even me in power, becoming a greater nation unlike what I could ever be.

I tried, oh how I tried to forget you. But the pain wouldn't just go away. Everyday you accomplished something new. I'd feel pride and pain coil in my gut every time you did something good. When you messed up, entered a new war, or even when your economy dropped to its lowest, I found that I still worried and fretted, scared for you. I didn't want to lose you completely, if I hadn't already.

I'm still broken. I can never get over this pain...

_Oh, you took his heart and my heart and none of the pain_

_You packed your suitcase, I took the blame_

_Now I'm tryin to make sense of what little remains_

_Cos you left me with no love and no love to my name..._

It was recently that I found myself watching your every move, monitering your every action and word. I've probably been doing it this whole time, but I've only just noticed it after that frog pointed it out. And after realizing that, I came to the conclusion that I love you. No, not that love that a parent feels for their child, or brotherly love, or even just as a dear friend of mine. No, I finally saw what my heart so blatantly refused to believe: I'm completely head over heels for you. And you and your stupidity, you can never see it. Though, that's my fault I suppose. I didn't get to raise you right. I failed you, and now you're finally happier. I wonder if you and Kiku would ever get together. He certainly seems infatuated with you. By the Queen, I hope not.

I keep trying to tell myself to just let you be happy at least, and ignore my own pain. I've been rather lonely, you know. Everything has revolved around you since I first saw you, and I haven't been able to concentrate on anything else. I'm here, alone, now, with nothing but my feelings to keep my company while you go off and live, free and happy. Without me.

Really, though, do you ever think about me?

_I'm still alive but I'm barely breathing_

_Just praying to a god that I don't believe in_

_Cuz I got time while she's got freedom _

_Cuz when a heart breaks no it don't break_

_No, it don't break_

_No, it don't break even, no_

I can't take it anymore, seeing the way you act so stupid, talking about heroes and aliens, and always trying to find another adventure, putting people before yourself, yet still being selfish at the same time. I swear, you're the only person in the world I know who could be so selfish, yet so kind and loving at the same time. If only you could read the atmosphere, and see better the situation, judge what to do instead of just jumping into danger without thinking. Oh, how I hate that. Don't you consider your own safety? I think your sometimes too wrapped up in your own world of glory, justice, and happiness, but you just don't care. You don't care if people want you, or what could happen to you, as long as you gain your desired result.

But it's just that aspect of you that leads you to completely forgetting about me. Sometimes I think I need more saving than those other countries in poverty, waiting for you to see me and come and save me, and to never leave me alone again. But you don't. I don't need more saving. That's quite stupid, really, and selfish of me. I just want you back, because I'm broken.

I always find it somewhat funny how the only person who can fix me is the one who broke me.

_What am I supposed to do when the best part of me was always you?_

_What am I supposed to say when I'm all choked up and you're okay?_

_I'm fallin' to pieces, yeah_

_I'm fallin' to pieces, yeah_

_I'm fallin' to pieces_

_(One's still in love while the other one's leavin')_

_I'm fallin' to pieces_

_(Cuz when a heart breaks no it don't break even)_

_Oh, it don't break even, no_

_Oh, it don't break even, no_

_Oh, it don't break even, no_

No, I'm being a tad bit too dramatic here. I'm not broken. My life isn't over. You aren't my world. I'm just in so much pain, that it feels that way. Because I'm just simply in love with you, you left me, and now all I can do is just watch you as you live, love, laugh, and forget me.

* * *

Okay, so, I originally wanted to make an AMV for this on youtube, but I don't have this song on my iTunes (sadly) so I just did this. It didn't quite turn out how I wanted, and it bugs me even more how it reminds me of another sad USUK one-shot I read recently, but oh well. Screw it. I don't care anymore. It's my story, I can do what I want with it! So there!

Please review peoples! Or Artie will cry!


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